Session 13: Grief / Seasons of Life

Objectives:

1. Discuss different types of loss (death, breakup, change of circumstances that could be difficult to reconcile such as being graduated from middle school heading to high school where you don't know anyone). Or, mundane/everyday experiences of frustration when losing a key, a wallet, or a cell phone. Discuss the different feelings and thoughts connected with these experiences.

2. Describe the emotional experience of grief as a knot of various emotions and can manifest as a mental health challenge (see below for reference to the "madness" of King George III). We can imagine the mix of tender and intense feelings coming in waves. However, the specific feelings can manifest differently for you than it does for others. We should not presume we know what someone is going through. It is especially important to practice empathy for those we know who have experienced loss.

3. Describe grief as a process of healing from a loss. If feelings of grief are shut out, healing from the loss will be stuck. Emphasize how grief is not about "getting over it" or "moving on" just as forgiveness is not about "forgetting."

4. Emphasize how the elements of R, E, A, C, T connect with the process of grief with special emphasis on Trust - trusting that there is such a thing as God's timing (see below in references for excerpt from book of Ecclesiastes).

References:


King George III suffered from a knot of emotions and challenging feelings stemming from the loss of his daughter Amelia and possibly compounded by the loss of the American colonies (though he was graceful in his defeat and welcoming of the new regime after the British surrender, it is thought that he may have equated the loss as a father does with children who seek to separate from the family). The way the knot of emotions manifested in him emotionally, and his response to it, led to others thinking he was going through a manic episode as he had acted unlike himself - in one instance, standing up during (Anglican) Mass and reading out loud Psalm 95 verse 10. He would also have bouts of talking nonstop for hours on end.

//artwork: by Jeremy Chen based on photo and screenplay of Nigel Hawthorne's portrayal of King George III in Alan Bennett's The Madness of King George (1994).

Seasons of Life

"There is an appointed time for everything,

and a time for every affair under the heavens.

A time to give birth, and a time to die;

a time to plant, and a time to uproot the plant.

A time to kill, and a time to heal;

a time to tear down, and a time to build.

A time to weep, and a time to laugh;

a time to mourn, and a time to dance.

A time to scatter stones, and a time to gather them;

a time to embrace, and a time to be far from embraces.

A time to seek, and a time to lose;

a time to keep, and a time to cast away.

A time to rend, and a time to sew;

a time to be silent, and a time to speak."

-Ecclesiastes (3:1-7)

        "The fourteen pairs of opposites describe various human activities. The poem affirms that God has determined the appropriate moment or “time” for each. Human beings cannot know that moment; further, the wider course of events and purposes fixed by God are beyond them as well." - USCCB footnote


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